To impress a beautiful newspaper editor, Johnny attempts to follow a story that proves cats are actually aliens from outer space.

Three different variations on a story taken place in the part where everyone is hurt, told by Carl, Suzy, and Johnny.

Johnny gets his hands on a real prehistoric dinosaur egg, which hatches. Johnny thinks that the dinosaur is a hamster, and he must keep his new pet (named Mr. Wuggles) from wreaking havoc in Aron City.

When Johnny takes Bunny’s hot rod, Carl convinces him to enter an auto race, where Carl controls it by a joystick. When the joystick short-circuits, Johnny is left to drive on his own.

Johnny talks to a beautiful woman eating at Pops’ restaurant, and she tells Johnny that he is no gentleman. Pops attempts to take Johnny and turn him into a gentleman, worthy of high society, within seven days.

—Knowing that it will sell millions, Johnny attempts to get the first issue of “Man Bean, the Bean That Walks Like a Man”. The comic is guarded by a ghost, and Johnny and Carl attempt to take it on—Ghostbusters style.

Johnny is mistaken for a karate expert, and agrees to help a “South of the border” town defeat an evil Mexican thief.

When Johnny mistakes Santa Claus for a burglar and knocks out jolly old Saint Nick (Tom Bosley), he must don the red cap to save Christmas.

When the Green Swoosh (a Green Lantern-like superhero) gets injured by a falling meteor, Johnny gets his super boots, the source of his power. Armed with super strength and speed, Johnny tries his hand at being a superhero.

With Mother’s Day just around the corner, Johnny tries to find a way to make money to buy his mama a gift. While Suzy becomes ridiculously wealthy with her simple lemonade stand, Johnny goes through all manner of jobs in an effort to raise the cash he needs.

All the wool in the city (including Johnny’s blanky) is being stolen by an evil, wool-loving thief named Dr. Filaniest and his kind pet kitten, Pooky the Cat. Johnny plays the role of hero, as he tracks down and defeats Dr. Filaniest.

Johnny sends away for a mail order perfect woman, but accidentally picks a Swedish fat woman named Helga instead. In an effort to ruin their “relationship”, Johnny takes Helga to Steege Cage wrestling.

Johnny, hoping to gain more muscle, buys a protein shake called “Uber Mass” from a shady scientist at the gym. He ignores the instructions in favor of drinking it all at once, and bloats up to a massively obese size. After drinking even more Uber Mass, Johnny grows to Godzilla-like proportions and decides to seek […]

Johnny forgets to send a letter to Santa Claus and must reach the North Pole before Christmas. When the post office tells him there is no way to get the letters to the North Pole, Johnny journeys to the North Pole himself. Unsure of where Santa lives, he agrees to take little Suzy along with […]

Johnny is named CEO of a major toy conglomerate and invents (defective) action figures of himself for the holiday season.

Bunny has Johnny deliver the cable TV bill, but he accidentally goes to a mad scientist’s laboratory, where he is cloned. Johnny must prove to everyone else that he is the real Johnny.

Johnny accidentally joins the French Foreign Legion and soon finds himself on a game show in Ancient Egypt, where he must find a way through the desert with the help of a reluctant camel named Lawrence.

In an effort to impress Suzy’s beautiful teacher, Johnny goes along with a gag that he is “Bravo-Man”, his superhero alter-ego. Johnny Uses his status to drop something suspicious in her glass of water.

After traveling to an island to meet babes, Johnny is turned into half-man, half-hamster. Enraged by this, Johnny vows to destroy the mutating machine.

When Johnny agrees to take the initiation trial for the “Brotherhood of the Gnu”, a fraternity that Pops and Carl are members of, he must face the daunting tasks of eating one potato chip and listening to Brother Ernie’s unnecessarily long story of buying a new couch.

Suzy has a new doll named Talky Tabitha, and invites Johnny over for a tea party to play with her–but Tabitha starts talking independently, and says she doesn’t like Johnny. Johnny squares off against the doll, who repeatedly thwarts his efforts to destroy her.

Bunny and Suzy enter a baking contest, but after Bunny accidentally injures herself playing football, Johnny has to take her place. Unfortunately, Johnny loses the recipe by accident.

Johnny trades the family cow for some magical hair tonic.

Johnny meets Enormous Ferguson, the famous basketball player. Johnny wants to help Ferguson and the Pogatuck Ferrets take on the Townsville Titans.